Saturday, December 08, 2007

Liquor store observations (part the first)

  1. When deciding what beer you want, close your mouth. You look like a retarded goldfish.
  2. If I can smell your perfume in the cooler, you probably have too much on.
  3. No, I don't have 40s of OE.
  4. I haven't tasted most of the wine in the store and I don't want to.
  5. No, I don't know which is the best White Zinfandel.
  6. Next time, write down the wine you liked on a napkin. I don't know "the wine with the guy on it or something."
  7. If you can't remember if is was Red or White, stop drinking completely.
  8. Phillips makes the best cheap vodka in our store.
  9. Kegs are, by nature, dirty things. Don't get mad if it makes a mess on your fancy leather upholstery. Bring a different car.
  10. I'm going to card you. I carded you the last time you were in and I'm going to continue doing it. It's not my rule. Deal with it.

5 comments:

The donut guy said...

I am so glad I work in a supermarket that doesn't sell beer or wine....

Me said...

Bro Yam-

What Alco-Shop do you gig in? Be cool to stop by some time: say "Hi" and ask if you sell... "the Merlot that has that chick doing that thing to a dog-like creature on the front label?"

-Me

Beast1624 said...

Having spent the better (or, should I say, worst) part of my life in the convenience store business all I can say is 'preach on, Brother Yam!'

Lunatic Biker said...

I bet he works at Zipps. I think you could buy Wisconsin with the money I spent at Zipps.

bother yam said...

No, not at Zipps. You and I are brothers of a different mother in the fact that we draw a paycheck from the good people of Richfield. The store by the Wendy's and the K-Mart.

Yes, we have some real winners that come in...